An Awe Inspiring Story

This morning while spending time with the Lord, I was given the prompt from my current study to write down what it was like when I first met Christ. The prompt was a little more fancy and basically led me to reflect back on my story. What stood out to me? What still amazes me about it? What was it really like?

I'm no stranger to sharing my story, but I had never thought of it like that. Of course I know deep down that the point of salvation in my life was the greatest gift I could ever receive. That realization in itself is awe inspiring. But the nitty gritty of how I came to know Christ, that never seemed to be all that great and inspiring.

We hear all the time these amazing stories of how God redeemed people at the lowest of their lows and turned their lives around in the blink of an eye. My story isn't like that. I don't remember the exact moment when I finally saw Jesus in all of his glory and made the decision to follow after him. It seemed to be a process for me. A process that I'm sure God had been working all my life, but I was unaware of until college.

I wanted to take some time to share that, because after this morning I realized how beautiful any salvation story is, and that includes mine. So here we go....

I was born into a family who loved God and proclaimed Jesus as their Lord and savior and I thought that was enough. To just believe that this God guy and Jesus guy existed. That Jesus loved me and died for my sins. I knew about Heaven and Hell and knew that I wanted to go to Heaven so I was going to do what I thought would ensure that. Go to Church, read a verse or two of the Bible a day, and pray as I fell asleep. As long as I believed in Jesus, that would get me that "Get out of Hell free card." But Scripture tells us again and again that even the demons believe and know who Jesus is (James 2:19, Mark 1:23-25, etc). So my whole basis of what it meant to be a Christian was not leading me to Heaven at all.

Now I knew enough about Christianity and the Bible to know that their were people who I knew who really were all in for Jesus. They lived differently, they wanted different things than me, and they just looked different than me. For a long time I felt like I would never get to that level of Christianity, but I knew I wanted what they had. It just took me a little time to get there.

Fast forward to college. After a rough freshman year, I came home for the summer and spent some time reflecting on myself and on what I had grown up being taught. I knew my life did not align with what Scripture teaches, but I honestly didn't know how to change. So my plan was to read my Bible everyday, go to Church on Sunday's and just pray that the habit stuck. I had tried to be like this before and every time I tried, I always failed. I'd stop reading, say I was too busy, and maybe make it to Church on a good Sunday. But this time I was for real, I wanted this to stick. I remember praying to God and asking him to make this stick, make this life change happen, heal me and help me.

After a summer of reading and kind of understanding what the Bible said, I came back to school with the intention of joining a Church and campus ministry. I was going to do everything in my power to make this Christian thing stick. It's funny even saying that now because it wasn't me at all, it was totally God.

Anyways, that fall I found a Church and joined a small group. I joined a campus ministry and began to get discipled. Being discipled definitely had one of the biggest impacts on my walk with Jesus. I don't really remember when it all made sense, but slowly things started to come together and I began to realize my need for Jesus, my sinfulness that he had atoned for on the cross, and my purpose in life. I was to build his kingdom. I was hooked, and ready to take on whatever he threw my way.

I remember that fall semester thinking through my plans and my discipler asked me "Kendall, what are you doing with your life?" My answer was what I had been planning since before we met. I replied with, "I'm going to become a wedding planner for Disney." Then she asked a question that has since then stuck with me, "But are you really going to do that?" I knew at that moment that she had more wisdom than I, and had seen something in me long before I had. I replied with, "Well I think I might want to work for CRU and do what you do."

My entire life had changed because this woman sat down with me every week and studied the Bible with me. She taught me how to do ministry, how to make disciples in my sorority house, and how to share the Gospel. I owe a lot to this woman and will be forever grateful that she took the time to teach me what it actually looks like to follow Jesus, not just believe, but to live for him.

My story wasn't one single moment and everything changed. It was a process, but God's process. It's beautiful, amazing, awe-inspiring, and exactly what God intended when he formed me in my mothers womb. It's a story that I should think of daily, that I should be excited to share. It's the best thing that could have happened to me and deserves to be shared.

I hope this story of my redemption has inspired you to look at your own story, see where God has left his handprints, and see the beauty within it. Share it with someone. Let them know how your life changed, how undeserving you were of it, but how gracious our loving Father is. That alone is enough for us to worship and praise him. Our stories all matter and are all awe-inspiring. Remember that, and rely on him to continue to grow your faith.